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Podcast: Play in new window | Download

When you’re confident in your body you’re not being prideful, you’re humbly acknowledging His gift of your body.

Your beauty is not a question is a statement.

God knit you together, counted your hairs. He cares about all the incredible intracacies of your body.

It matters what you do with it. God is all about the spirit and mind and soul. But He also says love the Lord with all your strength. Your body is important to God.

Jesus talked about the body when describing a husband and wife. Sexual immorality is not ok. It matters to God how you use your body.

What you do with your body matters to Him. And the way you think about your body matters to Him. Your body valuable.

Every time you look at the mirror you’re judging your body. You’re seeing if you look ok or if you’re pretty enough. Stop looking in the mirror. What space of your life, energy, time, desire is taken up by the desire to be the world’s standard of beauty? Is that going to matter in eternity? Why are we obsessed with it now?

I think you’ll enjoy the homework 😉 Flaunt it girl!

 

Next week: 175-Body P4: Honor Your Ressa

 

0:02
Welcome to the delight your marriage podcast. This show where you hear from amazing and inspiring wives sharing their struggles, triumphs, and advice for this journey called marriage. Here’s your host belah. Rose.

0:19
Oh, right. Welcome back. Thank you so much for joining this as belah rose, I am so thrilled that you’ve joined me on this body series. This is our third installment, the first one was all about. Behold, holding your body, just recognizing what God said about it. What it really means to be a person who honors their body, and who God made them to be made their body to be, I talk more about my story there and where I’ve come from and where I’m going. And I want to encourage you to go back and listen to that, to kind of get a sense of, you know, why I think I have a right to tell you any of this stuff. Because by God’s grace, he’s he’s taught me a lot and changed me a lot. And that’s been. Yeah, really important. And I think it gives you an opportunity to process your stuff and where you came from, and where you want to go. The next thing was going towards knowing your worth understanding how God made your husband incredibly attracted to you. And the final thing is, you know, what it means your, your food stuff, what it means to, to be kind of like running away from life and using food to numb what you don’t want to deal with. And I have lots and lots of personal experience with that. So I encourage you to listen to that episode to see what God might want to open your eyes to that. Were my eyes were super, super open, I had no idea. So yeah, that was that was part two. Part three, flaunt, don’t seek approval. So last week, and kind of through this, I really hope that you listen to the series in order, because this is going to make way more sense if you do if you’re just doing you know, dropping in two different ones. I feel like you’re not going to get a lot of the understanding that this all builds on each other. So I encourage you if you’re going to want your perspectives on body to change, and I believe to be more free and more aligned with God’s will and getting just enjoying sex because you actually relax into your body you feel comfortable in your own skin, regardless of the size that you are. I asked you to just engage in this entire series and and really use it as a tool for you to move forward. Alright, so flaunt, don’t seek approval. I have talked about how God has given you and made this body for you, right? You’re not the one that did this. God did. And so when you’re confident in your body, you’re not being prideful. You are humbly acknowledging and accepting this gift that God gave you. The beauty of your body is not a question. It’s a statement. God gave you beauty. You have been wonderfully made, and fearfully made. Right? That’s a whole nother topic, but you have been wonderfully made. He meet you together in your mother’s womb. You are not accidentally the color of your skin. You’re not accidentally that eye color. You don’t happen to have those freckles. No, this is God’s design. He even knows how many hairs on your head he gave you. He knows he made your body. And it matters what you do with it. Right? How many times does it talk about sexual immorality in the Bible? To not do it? But it’s like, what if I just was blindfolded and had sex? All that is his body, right? What does that have to do with anything? Isn’t God really just care about the spirit and the mind and my thoughts and all that stuff? Know God cares about your body. God cares about your body, what you do with your body, matters to him. The way you think about your body matters to him. You know, when you really get this, when you understand

5:08
that this is valuable, regardless of how you look, you are valuable, your body is valuable you have worth, you didn’t give it to yourself, you didn’t earn it, you didn’t go to the gym enough hours or eat the right things or whatever your body is valuable. Because I think if we start to understand the value that God has given us as women, our bodies it changes our entire perspective on the way we interact with the world. We’re not going into the world asking, am I enough? Am I beautiful? Do I captivate you? You’re going into the world saying, I am beautiful. I have been given beauty

6:05
and that’s why it’s so important in your marriage bed. Because when you come out of the bathroom fully dolled up in your you know, maybe you showered and you have this lovely lingerie on and you you know, walk in front of your husband scantily clad, clad, and you’re like, Hey, man, I want to eat this Sala. That is saying, I know you want this, because this is good stuff. All right. But you’re not coming out. You know, like in your teddy and you’re kinda got your shoulders down, and you come through and you’re like, Uh huh. And you feel so silly and awful. And you’re kind of giving him this look like, aren’t you turned on by me, won’t you? Won’t you, you know, won’t you assure me that everything’s okay. Or I’m, you know, and that takes him totally out of this like excited phase. And it puts him in this totally different phase of like, Oh, I’ve got to make her feel better. When you’re not trying to do that, as a woman, you’re trying to be sexy and exciting and all that. But if you don’t recognize that you are, you are sexy, you are beautiful. You are everything that you need to be to turn him on and make him wild, then you won’t be able to. If you don’t realize you are everything that you need to be to make him wild. You won’t be able to you have to realize that you have to live into that it’s true. God made you that way. God made you that way that your husband is wildly excited about your body. Because he made you that way. So when you enter into the bedroom, you are flaunting you are not asking for his approval. You are not asking for his affirmation, you are flaunting you are like babe, I have got what you want. And that’s why teasing is so vital in your seduction and in the way that you interact sexually throughout the day, even before you get close to making love, right? Teasing is all about I know you want it, but you can’t have it. I mean, that’s what it is. It’s all this like, Hmm, oh, you know, it’s this like, kind of like pulling the tie close and be like pushing him away. You know, it’s just this. It’s just really fun, cool way of, of enticing. And that’s what we are as women, we are the receivers, we are the ones that attract and bring him forward. And, you know, the more that you do that fun interaction, it makes sex so much better for both of you because it’s way more fun when you know, you’ve got what he wants. And then he acts like you got what he wants, because that’s what you want. You want to know that he you drive him wild, you want to know that you’re every thing he could have dreamt of. Right? But you’ve got to know first and foremost that you are that. That you are that. You’ve got to do the hard work. You’ve got to discipline yourself to accept that that’s true. Once again, you did not make your body you did not choose your skin color. You did not choose the way your body is shaped. Okay. God did that. And I don’t care if you’re if you have if you’re overweight. This is still the hard work you have to do. It’s still the hard work of being confident because it really doesn’t matter what shape or how much you weigh, this is hard work to do. Do it anyway. Even when you’re not at your perfect weight, or you don’t have the same, you know, size pants as you did in college, or even when you were married, or whenever you know where you are right now. Flaunt it. You’re beautiful except it. Because if you think about it, oh, gosh, there was someone I talked to one point he said that there was only one woman this is kind of hilarious. But he said, there’s only one woman that I’ve ever, you know, almost had an affair with? Oh, really? Who would that be? And he was like, I don’t even think I asked. I think he just decided to tell me.

10:49
And he was like, she was actually 400 pounds. I was like, really? It’s like, yeah, she um, she was so confident. It hadn’t, it had nothing to do with the weight. Nothing. She just knew. She was so confident. And I feel like we, in our culture, we just assume we put this on ourselves that we have to be x, or we’re not beautiful. But where’s that standard coming from? Where is the standard of beauty that says you need skinny calves or you need a certain waistline or you need, you know, a certain shape face? Or a certain shape eyes or whatever? Where’s that standard coming from? It’s not God’s standard. No, you are the standard of beauty. God made you the standard of beauty in your marriage in your household. You. You are the standard. Does that make sense? There’s not like, you know, this skinny, big busty blonde all these things? No, no, no, no, no. God made you the standard of beauty. All that other stuff? Is their husband standard of beauty. You are your husband’s standard of beauty in your house. And and it has to be your standard of beauty. You need to accept that you are that beauty? You are. So how do we do this? Practically? How do you move into a place of your flaunting? Your flaunting you’re not? Am I beautiful? Well, first thing for me was really important was to stop looking at mirrors. It sounds silly, but every time I would pass a mirror, I would assess whether or not it was beautiful. It might have been a split second, but boom, I was like, do I look beautiful today? Oh, my muffin top showing, darn it. And then suddenly I’m in a different zone, I’m suddenly thinking about how inadequate My beauty is how, how undesirable I look. So I had to stop looking at mirrors. I really, I rarely look at a full length mirror. I really do. And I think it’s much much better for me, I would encourage you to do that as an experiment, try it for a day. If you you know, have to stretch yourself even to do that. Try for a week, just to see, you know, maybe you’ve got to cover up some of the full length mirrors that are in your house, I actually had a friend paint over some of my grandmother Well, one of my grandmother’s mirror. It’s a beautiful frame. So I didn’t want to get rid of it. But I had her paint over at this gorgeous sunset that has a Bible verse on it. It’s beautiful. I love it. So yeah, I checked my face before I leave the house. Because, you know, that’s, that’s something that I do. But otherwise, you know, sometimes I’ll glance in the, in the full length in the in the bathroom, in case I need to look at what I’m wearing. But yeah, I probably look at the full length one time before I leave the house to or whatever. But that’s it. I work hard to not do that. I mean, certainly I’ll make the mistake of glancing and reflection walking by a building at times. But when I do make that mistake, I can tell I can tell them the way I think about myself. And the truth is when you die you are not going to wish that you were more beautiful. It’s not gonna matter. It’s just not. And for you to value that day in and day out is the most important thing. And when I say I don’t know, I hope that you’re getting this. What does that mean? At the end of your life? Is it gonna matter? The things you’re thinking about right now the ways that you’re judging yourself right now. You know the chunks of time that it takes up your life and mental energy to think about how you can lose weight and you know how fat you are right now or wherever isn’t going to matter, you know, in the long term?

15:17
No, it’s not. What is going to matter is if you’re confident, and you’re able to do what God wants you to do now. And what he wants you to do is to be unified with your husband to have an awesome marriage to have an awesome, intimate life, to totally connect to be excited about each other. Right. And so that’s why flaunting, not asking, not seeking the approval not asking the mirror, Am I beautiful? No, you come to the table. Beautiful. You’re not asking anyone. No, I am beautiful. God made me this way. I am this way. So here’s your homework for this week. And again, please do it. Take the time to do it. If you want real change, you’ve got to do something, you can’t just think about it, you’ve got to do something about it. So I encourage you to do an experiment this week. Don’t look in the mirror, you might want to do one check Face Body, that’s it no more. And you could even when you make love to your husband, see what it’s like to just wear something really sexy, and not look in the mirror. Just put it on. And you know, do a little sexy dance in the bathroom while you’re like getting yourself in the mood. But don’t look at yourself. And I guess in addition to that, make love this week. If you’re not making love at least once a week, start, all right, this is my encouragement to you is to start making love to your husband. It’s an important thing. And the more you feel comfortable in your body, the more you’ll do that. So come here back next week, and we are going to be talking about let me give you the title. We are going to be talking about honoring your ReSSA. If you don’t know what rest is come back next week, it’s gonna be really, really great.

17:22
All right, you heard me make sure you’re making love this week. And go ahead and stretch yourself. If what I’ve discussed is something that seems way, way out of your normal zone. In terms of wearing something sexy, I am encouraging you to push yourself to wear something sexy, go buy something sexy, it doesn’t have to be expensive. Even you could just use something normal around the house that you could use as something sexy. I have used curtains before, believe it or not. I mean, you could just do whatever you want to do be creative. But wear something sexy. Don’t look in the mirror. But do it this week, flaunt it this week. You’re not seeking approval. You are flaunting what God has given you. All right, my dear, great work. I’m so impressed that you’ve stuck with me in this series. We’ve got a lot more to go. And I know that you’re getting free. Day by day as you’re doing this work. I’m proud of you. I’m rooting for you. Don’t give up. Keep going. Continue this journey with me. I will be talking to you next week. A really important show for you. God bless. Bye.

18:45
Thanks for listening. Stop by delight your marriage.com to check out all the show notes as well as many more resources and articles. Until next time, live with love, wisdom impassion