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Hi there,
Not sure if it was for you… but for me it was a whirlwind of a weekend. I put on a church conference on Saturday (in Spanish–eek!) which was scary, but God came through in an awesome way, which was so cool!
Also, on Friday I had the chance to interview 3 different graduates from my Masculinity Reclaimed program. Today’s podcast is of Charles.
His story is hard to believe—but one that will surely give you hope.
To be transparent, I have 2 ulterior motives for sharing his story:
1- To invite you to my Free & Live Men’s Masterclass coming up really soon, sign up here: www.delightyourmarriage.com/menstraining
My prayer is that men’s lives are utterly and forever changed just by attending the Free Men’s Masterclass Live.
And possibly, after the 3-part Free Men’s Masterclass, you decide to enroll in the Masculinity Reclaimed program, which is what Charles went through.
But my plan on the Free Men’s Masterclass is not going to be a “hide-the-ball” presentation, but to genuinely help your marriage turn around!
2- To listen to the man who came into marriage and throughout his marriage with sadly, huge measures of infidelity. And yet, God did an incredible work of grace and healing in their marriage—reflected in their intimacy.
And now, he can scarcely believe what his wife is doing for him in intimacy. (Bucket-list, before-he-dies-type-stuff!)
Wild, right? I think you won’t believe it unless you hear it, here. Plus he drops some serious golden nuggets you can apply immediately to your marriage, that you won’t want to miss. God is good!
Blessings,
Belah
PS Don’t forget to sign up for the training now, so you don’t forget! www.delightyourmarriage.com/menstraining
You’ll want to put that on your calendar and clear your weekend to make sure you can attend live!
transcript
0:02
Welcome to the delight your marriage podcast. You’re joining me belah rose as I dive deep into the beauty, power and truth about intimacy, learn not only the practicals, but the heart behind what making love is all about. delight your marriage. All right, welcome back. Thank you for joining. It is such a pleasure and honor to be invited into your time, I know that you are busy, and you’re doing a lot. And I don’t take it lightly that you spend time with me every week. Except last week, I didn’t spend time with you because I was too busy doing lots of random last minute stuff for this Chilean conference. That was on Saturday. And if you listened to the week prior, you know that I asked for prayer around it. And I want to just thank you for praying if you were one of those that prayed or if not, you’re still going to hear me thinking. Because it went so well. It went so well. So if somebody from the conference is listening in, they’re going to hear all the you know, secret backstory that was all behind the scenes. But, um, what happened was, she originally reached out to me like six months ago, and I was nervous because it was in Spanish. So I thought, You know what, I want to learn Spanish. I’ve you know, I probably know a little bit but so I thought this is plenty of encouragement to like a reason to really focus in for the next six months and really learned. So it was on my goal list, like every single week. I mean, the ladies that hold me accountable, they heard me like I practice this week, I didn’t this week, I didn’t this week, I should do it next week, like just, it was all over the place. So finally, the week before the conference, I had most of the conference already written and then translated in Spanish, and then I’m practicing with my husband I’m trying to, and I was like, basically at a spot where I would just need to read the script to them. And as not a non native speaker, just reading to people on a video conference. Like that is not interesting at all. And then my husband was kind enough to listen, it was like a Wednesday. Yeah, it was the Wednesday before the conference, he listened to the talk where I had so far or No, no, it was the Wednesday before sorry. So anyway, and I really I realized, like, there’s no way I’m going to be able to just read this thing, and actually help people like they’re just going to be bored out of their mind and probably just sign off. I mean, a Saturday on a video call. There’s no way they’re going to stick around. And and so anyway, I ended up having to ask for it to be translated, because I was just like, really nervous. Okay, so anyway, fast forward. Somebody did translate. And. And Wednesday, the Wednesday before the conference, I practiced the speech with my husband, like the full conference thing, which, you know, was a three hour deal. And my husband’s feedback, which he’s never said before. And he’s always very kind. He always listens to my podcast, his feedback was, it’s boring. So yeah, so praise God for my wonderful, kind, gentle husband and the way he said it, but that is what basically came across is it was boring. And I think the reason it was is because I was nervous around doing it in Spanish, which is a completely different outside of my comfort zone situation. And so, come to Thursday, before the conference on Saturday, I started over and tried to make it as fun and exciting and relaxing and playful. With breaks and videos and slideshow presentations with music and a little dance it like just a multimedia event. I was like I’m not gonna make this boring. So, so by God’s incredible grace, Thursday night, I practice it again with my husband and he was like blown away at this presentation that again is three hours long.
4:40
That was completely different than the day before. So I say that because it was one of those prayers that morning that I was like, Lord, you’re gonna have to do this because I am not able to do this like this is totally on you. Like if these people are going to be blessed it is on you. Which is a great place to be because it’s right in our way. weakness, he is strong. So it really helped me to, to really trust like his hand is in this, if I’m trying to do it on my own strength I can not, it is not going to help anyone. It’s just going to make people feel condemned and negative and all these things. So it was such a blessing. And I really just was so grateful. And you know, after the the full Oh, the other thing that was such God thing is, there was not a single tech issue, not a single tech issue. Like I have tech issues more often on my one on one client calls than I did on a full three hour with all these multimedia things. Like there wasn’t even like a pregnant pause, there was just a chest went and which, again, thank you for praying for me, thank you for praying for this ministry. It just was such a gift. So many, so many people pray for this ministry. And one other thing about prayer is I know, there are people that listen to me and pray for me that I will never meet. And I don’t know. And I have to say thank you so much. Right? Because this work is hard. But the amount of negative feedback I’ve had, and I speak boldly on here, you know that? I mean, I can pretty much counted on one hand. It’s not that people agree with me really, like I say some hard things, and sometimes I’m wrong. But the amount of negative feedback I’ve had is count, I could really count on one hand and I don’t even remember them, really. They don’t affect me. So the reason I say that is I know you’re praying for me. I know you’re praying for my family. The other thing is like the enemy doesn’t want marriages to be healed. He doesn’t want families to be safe. He doesn’t want people to grow closer to Jesus. Are you kidding me? Like my goodness, but because I know you are praying for me. My my family is strong and protected. We are protected. So sorry, that was just a little tangent. But I know even if it’s just one person out there that is praying I am but I know it’s more. I know, I’ll see you in heaven. And I’ll wrap my arms around you and say thank you, Jesus. Yeah, you are you are doing God’s work in that. So, again, thank you so much. All right. Well, today oh my gosh, I have a great guest you are going to be I think he’s just gonna blow your socks off. So two, two immediate ulterior motives I have is one is if you are, man, I hope that you’re going to join my Men’s training. It’s called it’s a men’s masterclass, it’s coming up October 9 10th and 11th. Charles is a gentleman that just came through my masculine a reclaimed program. So the men’s masterclass is three days, at least an hour training, we’ll see it might go to hour and a half. But it’s going to start at 7pm. Eastern time. So the men’s masterclass, totally free. I’m going to teach my heart out, like, I just I want people to get on that call. And it’s going to transform their marriages forever. That is what I want for a free conference. Now there there will be some people who want more and want the practical, tailored guidance and the accountability in my whole program, which is what Charles went through. And if that’s you, then you can join after those three days. There’s going to be like an enrollment period for a week and you can join so totally up to you. But no matter what, I want you to come to the men’s masterclass because like I said this is I really want to help you I want that masterclass to change lives. And I think my perspective has shifted in the way I’m pursuing the men’s training a little bit because I just there’s so much I want to just give and transform men’s lives. So anyway, so Charles went through the mat the the full masculinity reclaim program three month program intensive, like that’s what he did. So his story is just incredible.
9:25
Where he started out with severe infidelity and where they are now with incredible passion in their marriage. I’ll let him tell you and then the next piece before I say this, so that’s my one ulterior motive is to come into the masterclass October 9 10th and 11th. Live Free. My second ulterior motive is that you listen really carefully to what Charles has to say, because the things that Charles says Is he has nuggets of gold in his conversation Like just gold. And so I want you to listen for those. Because sometimes we actually learn better when we hear somebody else’s story. I don’t know what it is about stories, but we just, we grab on to actual lessons in there. So I invite you to listen, with an open heart and a curious heart, a curious heart to say, You know what, I bet I have something to learn here. What can Charles teach me? And? Yeah, that’s my goal for you. Okay. No further ado, let’s dive in all right, Charles, welcome. Thanks for being here.
10:50
Glad to be here. Thanks.
10:52
Yes. So um, so I guess I’d like to start out by just asking you about what your marriage has been, like, historically, over, over the many years, you guys have been married?
11:05
Sure, um, probably the simplest way to put that would be a series a series of intense explosions chained together by more or less lengthy periods of apathetic peace that was at work. And, you know, you would get to the passion only ever seemed to flare around the bad things. And the good times were peaceful, but they wouldn’t say they were passionate. Okay. So that’s probably, you know, there’s a long history of infidelity that I brought to the marriage and my wife just found out about a couple years ago. And that’s brought its own unique set of challenges, as we’ve struggled to get through that. And my wife has been very gracious about it all, exceedingly. I’ve actually never heard of anybody trying to work through the stuff that she’s had to work through. And so I’m a very gracious are grateful for that. But there’s a lot of hurdles to overcome. And then, you know, bringing my history into this trend to, to work through my own character defects. It’s just, it’s, it’s a gong show of problems that everybody I’ve brought this to has kind of thrown their hands up in the air and said, I honestly don’t have a clue, we got to start really small areas. Let’s try and make little progress here or there in this tiny area, which isn’t really a big help when, you know, they’re helping me gain an inch, but I’m three miles behind. So that’s kind of where I brought my particular opinion of where we’re at in the marriage. So
12:41
Wow. And and what made you start the masculinity reclaimed program,
12:49
an error in calculations, I looked around and was looking at stuff and I, my wife had done this course I think you probably familiar with the lady. Sheesh, remember her name, she does a series of webinars for ladies anyway, she did a whole month of them at a time and you were one of the resources that she used. And so anyway, I was happened to have my wife’s email open one day, and I saw this name, some, like, your marriage is like, whatever. And so I went on your website. And there’s a whole bunch of courses that I was like, seriously hoping my wife would take. And but in amongst those, I saw one, it said, masculinity reclaimed. And it was talking about learning how to love your wife again. And I was doing a couple other work. Things that had to do with character work in my air was as I thought, primarily, your course was dealing with character issues, which is not fantastic. I need to get out of this. So I, I bit the bullet, and I did it. And it was correct. I was a lot of character issues, I need to do it. I wasn’t aware that there was nearly as much training in there is there was and so I was in shock for a while trying to figure out man, I’m a dead man. And if my wife finds out, and I just rolled with it and went and so it was good.
14:07
Guys. Yeah, that’s awesome. Um, okay, well tell me, you know, going through the program, what are some of the important lessons you learned?
14:22
Well, I guess probably the first thing I would have learned is that this stuff should have been taught to people before you got married, quite literally. I have read way too many books have been involved in all sorts of stuff that I shouldn’t have. But I haven’t found anybody who gave you a blueprint to try and find a way to your wife’s heart, just have never found that. And I would have paid money. The money I didn’t have to go into debt for decades to have had that information before I got married, and so on. That’s it, the biggest thing was, I think probably about a couple weeks into it, I started to feel a little hope, and hope will change your world. And I know because I’ve spent like two years without hope coming out and coming clean about all this stuff, left you in a spot where you were, you’re clean, but you’re not healing. And then to not be able to progress further into my relationship to catch my wife’s heart. That was huge. And so to have a little bit of hope meant you could all of a sudden try means you had a path to fall that looked like it had success. So finding hope meant that I could begin to put a little bit of effort into it again, it’s hard to hit your head against the wall three times a day when you’re not making any progress. But if you think you might make some progress, I can hit my head again, you know, and so that was that was a big one was just having a plan that looked like it had a reasonable chance of success based upon the fact there’s a lady teaching me okay, because, you know, if the guy telling me like, Dude, you don’t know anything more than I do. My wife showed me something the other day, she said, when you can understand why. Why pizza comes in square boxes around pizza and square boxes cut into wedges, then you’ll understand why women are women. They’re like, yeah, that’s about right. I understand that. So that was that was one of them was was just sheer hope, having hope. And probably probably the other one was just the, the gratitude, the daily gratitude stuff. I mean, I’ve talked for a long time about forgiveness, I cried, the day, we did forgiveness, I cried, I just like, I turned my turn my video off, and I’m sitting there crying while you’re doing this stuff, as I’m dealing with. I mean, I had, I couldn’t believe how much stuff I had to forgive my wife for and, you know, coming from her side of it with, with all the stuff she’s already forgiven me for it seems inconsequential, but it wasn’t there, there was tons of stuff just backlogs of stuff that that my guy heart, I guess it just been hurting for for so long. And so working through that, you know, even even having the fill in sheets, you know, no one, I’m gonna have to talk to belah he made me sign that wretched. Like, you know, sign your soul away on a dotted line here, you will do what I see for the remainder of the course. That’s where my first morning somewhere along anyway. You get that done. And then all of a sudden, it’s, you know, you got to put the effort into it and, and the the money was, was a motivator. But it wasn’t nearly as much of motivators I promised. Right? And so, because I promise you put in the work, and then two, three weeks, you might start seeing results and then it wasn’t hard to put the work in. So
17:53
that’s amazing. That’s amazing. Okay, so you said results. Tell me tell me what are some things that you saw.
18:01
Um, I think that some of the biggest results were the most obvious one to me was my wife started apologizing. And, and I cannot get over this fella. Like, I just can’t. The problem when you marry an almost angel is that she’s she’s Angel enough that that most of the time you don’t need to worry about it. But when she’s not Angel, it’s a problem. And they’re in hard to get her to see that over the years. And I love the girl to death, but it was driving me insane. And emote. Like four weeks into this, all of a sudden, she started apologizing for little stuff. And it has just kept on and kept on kept on like, like we have not had a perfect relationship. And the last couple of weeks, we’ve had some insane time, pressure and building pressure like our life is in. Probably if we were talking pressure wise, we’re dealing with the boat of 14 out of 10. Okay, so that’s what our life is like at the moment. And normally in my history, this would be World War four, because three would have been very small. Okay. And we have had some hiccups. And we have had some some tough times and a few heat hours, which is nothing compared to in stuff. We’re like, no, biting my tongue and it’s like, I’m bleeding at the lips because I’m so hard. And I walk away to get some space and a few minutes later she comes over to me and says I’m sorry. You know, case in point this morning. We woke up and she was upset over some miners like okay, well we were update so I start making the bed and everything. A few minutes later she comes out of the shower, she pops your head down she says I had the worst stream of votes you and she starts telling me about the dream and all this stuff was going on in her head. And she says, and she looks at me and she gives me this half grin. She says, You have a lot to make up for selling the dream, as we had a chuckle over this because it was a dream. No, listen, this is a small thing. But that would never have happened before. Never. And I’m still just like, I’m afraid that the bubble is gonna burst. And we’ll stop, we’ll go back to where it was. And I am learning to enjoy the time with her. And I can’t say enough good things about the what’s happened in our marriage. It’s just amazing.
20:30
Wow, wow, Praise God. Praise God. You know what I, I loved one story that you shared at some point was the you mentioned your father came to visit? Can you tell that story a little bit?
20:45
Yeah, sure. So a little background, I guess is that my pride over the years, and my arrogance and my opinions that I was, you know, all this and that. Basically, let me give my wife a bad rap for a lot of things. And when we would go meet together or be with my parents sent me a lot of pressure on her to act and be a certain way. And I just, I was really cruel to her in those ways. And so as a result, our interactions with family have always been very strained. And when folks have come to visit us, she’s been often worried, I think, from my own background, but my critical tongue would have, you know, chewed her up in that and so she’d be worried about those things. And anyway, my folks came over to visit a while back, and we were just, you know, this is something new we’re trying is right in the middle of this stuff we’re doing with you. And anyway, Dad sends me a note and he says, I don’t know what you’re doing. He says, but keep it up. He says, I’ve never seen your wife so happy, ever. And this is just like, awesome. And it’s the truth. I mean, she’s telling me jokes. I mean, I’ve been wanting my entire marriage long for her to joke with me. And she is all of a sudden started joking with me. And I haven’t been begging her for that often. I came from a family that was cracking jokes all the time. And just straight laced girl was just And now she’s telling me jokes all the time. And I love it. It’s just amazing.
22:21
Oh, my God, praise God. Praise God. Well, um, so there are some things would you be willing to share? It’s totally up to you. But would you be willing to share a little bit before and after about intimacy, what it was like and how it’s changed throughout the program?
22:36
Yeah, I could do that. Um, I guess simplest way to put it would be because of because of my sin, and my involvement in all sorts of foolishness that I shouldn’t have been. I came into my marriage, let alone after it. But I came into my marriage with a with a playbook and a recipe book that was dozens and dozens of pages long. And they married a girl who had zero training and no information whatsoever. And so I was afraid to talk about anything, because it would reveal everything I already knew that I shouldn’t. And because of that, there, she believed that I didn’t want her and the things that she was expecting, and the things that she wanted weren’t happening either because I was all held back and everything so then we fast forward 20 years to I’ve come clean about everything, we’re all on the same page, we understand everything. But we still have no no real means of going forward. We reached a place where she is experiencing a lot of pleasure in a relationship but it’s not. It’s not necessarily mutual, and my head is not feeling I’m not feeling respected. I’m not feeling really fulfilled. And that has changed. I just gotta say that has changed. I very rarely experienced any difficulties in the bedroom I used to I was having a lot of problems just functioning to get my head out of the place where I felt so disrespected. And so so much as a failure as a man that I couldn’t even get my head in the game and then that has changed a lot and and now my wife is a I’ve often kind of joked that the peacock marry the sparrow, okay, flamboyant. I would wear purple and orange and I would walk down there with white shoes and a bell in my hat. I just don’t care. That’s the kind of the way I would and she’s got me wearing browns and all this kind of stuff, right? So that’s that’s fine. What has surprised me is that this Sparrow mouse has turned into a tiger and I cannot hardly keep up I am I am continually having my socks blown off. I don’t understand sometimes what’s going on. And she’s making me promises and then she’s fulfilling them. It’s, it’s to give you a number variant we have gone from in my mind. And again, this is mine, this is not my wife, okay, so she might have a different opinion and whatever. But I would say in my mind, we have gone from in a few short months, to from from a two to a seven, or eight. And there’s lots of stuff I want to try. And as long as the place I want to go in, there’s a lot of experiences that we’ll learn as we grow together. But I don’t feel any more like, like, I am trying to drag her. I feel like her engine is running beside me. And we both got traction on the wheels, and it’s a unique and crazy liberating feeling. Wow.
25:55
Wow. I feel like there have been many, many reports of this was like on the bucket list before I die. And it just happened.
26:08
Oh, yeah. Yeah, there’s a, like, the other day, you know, she asked me for something. And I had to ask her again, what she said, Because I was losing my mind. I had no like this. I was okay. Yes, like, please, but wait a second, I gotta write this down somewhere before I forget. Like, it was just amazing stuff. So she’s, you know, and that’s that’s the thing to Bella is that. You know, as guys we grew up, if you grew up in in filth, you grew up thinking that the appearance or the the, the activities, perhaps, that those those are very little of the whole experience, the biggest thing has been for me is that she really seems to care about trying to connect her hearts, and what’s important to me, in inside the bedroom, and she’s all of a sudden, really just. And the thing is, she’s always been like that. But my response outside the bedroom, and the way I treated her before, inhibited all that. And so I have not changed my wife, I have removed the roadblocks of this village idiot for letting her blossom the way the Lord wanted her to. Okay. And that has been the biggest thing. Because there wasn’t anything in the stuff. He taught me about changing her. It was all about changing me, which is what I needed. And we’re just gonna run it. And so as I began to change me, it was like, I just kind of removed the poisons from the flower bed, and she just started to blossom. And it was just amazing to watch. And I’m looking forward to letting him blossom a lot. Oh, my God.
28:04
Praise God. Charles. That’s incredible. Absolutely incredible. This is a it’s amazing. And you How many kids do you have? Seven? And how does that impact your kids now that things have changed?
28:21
Well, I think I see them happier. I think I see them. I see a little more hope on their faces. Because you got to understand, this has not been an easy road for us at all. Like we’re talking. Just just a hair from divorce for years kind of thing. And the other day, we had a squabble and I was telling my kids, the little tiny ones, I said, See, you got to understand. I said if mom was completely perfect, I wouldn’t have to change because Mum would be able to handle absolutely every piece of credit ever gave her. So but mums not completely perfect. So that means I have to change. Okay, I understand. So if we’re back in a situation that’s tough, and I’m having to work through it, it’s because God’s tested me again to see if I’ve changed. You know, I didn’t win that battle perfectly the way I wanted to. But I think, you know, batting 80 or 90% on a very difficult night is a whole lot better than I want to use the bad 15. So that’s the way we’ve been looking at and the kids have been encouraged. You know, it was a real tough moment, and I got some some bitter emails and whatever. And the kids were like, Dad, you’re coming home. I said, you know, I’m not the person I used to be. And unlucky and lucky for your mom, I’m coming home anyway. And we did and we got things worked out. And, you know, that was a couple days ago and things are still great. You know, we went from conversations that were difficult taking days and sometimes weeks to resolve to taking minutes to taking The theme 20 minutes you know, being able to handle insanely tough times, and and to recover from them so much easier because the emotional connection has grown so much recently.
30:13
Praise God, praise God and, and who took the course?
30:18
Who took the course? Yeah, that’s great. You know, I would I would I have listened to a bunch of your podcasts. And, honestly, belah. I’ve seen some of the reviews and things you’ve said. But God has obviously gifted you with understanding both sides of the equation. And it’s a talent, it’s a gift that he gave you specifically. And for a time such as this, and I am very grateful that I found your stuff and hoping to take some more of it as we go on. And May my wife will take some too. But the thing is, is this is the whole, you know, haven’t parts of the puzzle. I’ve had parts of these puzzles all over the place. There’s books galore, there’s stuff everywhere. But you can’t, you can’t treat just a little tiny portion of the puzzle, you have to hit it all together. And that’s, for me, what masculinity reclaimed helped me do was hit all the pieces of the puzzle at the same time. So you can see something moving on instead of just you know, add this chunk or add that chunk or whatever it just it made so much sense when I put it together that way.
31:26
Oh, that’s incredible. Oh, just amazing, Charles. And that’s that’s the incredible thing to see is that you applied and things transformed. Your wife didn’t take a course like it was just your implementation, which is just amazing.
31:41
Yeah, yeah. And you know, the the work I tried to for years. You cannot, you cannot make somebody else change. And I had tried, in ways subtle and not subtle to get her to change all sorts of things. And when I cease trying to change her and tried to change me instead, with some help from you, and the Lord and other places, I saw Mel honestly, I saw more change in my relationship with my wife in the last three months than I saw in the last 20 years. Just industry.
32:19
Amazing, thank you. Thank you, Charles. Well, is there any kind of final thoughts that you want to give a to somebody considering taking masculine at reclaim?
32:32
Yeah, do it. First of all, do it. And, and I mean it, do it. Like, if the finances or consideration, get alone, hit your father up, get get a loan from the friends who have to bail you out, when you’re having a fight with your wife, whatever, just do it. It’s, it’s, it’s worth it. The second thing is, is that if you focus on what you’re going to get out of it, you won’t, you won’t do the work you need. But if you focus on what you need to change, you’ll get the results you want. And that was for me such a huge thing to find defined how much how much core level details I had missed on a day to day basis with my wife. We’re wired differently as men. We’re wired to build a building, we’re wired to change the world with these massive monumental strokes. And God built us that way. Otherwise, we’d never do these things. But dealing with your wife is a game of inches. And you’re talking about everyday little things all the time. And if you’re coming from a place like I was with your wife, dealing with two decades of emotional neglect and abuse and all this kind of stuff going into it. You can’t afford to just throw one big grand gesture at it and leave a goal you need the discipline to build day upon day upon day. And that’s what this course will help you learn how to be
34:03
thank you so much, Charles so much. Listen, can I ask you one final thing is if there’s a gentleman listening who’s who’s in a spot that you were in, would you be willing to pray for them on this call?
34:17
Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Heavenly Father, Lord, you know the, the great payment is in broken relationships. And sometimes as men, we want it all inside and we put on that tough exterior but we’re dying when they’re in order. There’s some element is dying on the inside and wondering who’s gonna make it and trying to make it but he’s afraid he’s just not going to be able to win as you give him the courage. If he decides to invest in the course password that you give him the courage to go into it wholeheartedly. Change is possible. If the Lord can change me, and if my marriage can go from near disaster to enjoyable in just a series of months, then you can do that for anybody. And we would ask that you would give whoever this person might be hope. Hope will change his life and give life to his wife and cause it to be joy among his children as they see the relationship becoming what it always could have been what you want it to be. And as you give them encouragement this day, thank you for Bella matching bless her to Jesus. Amen.
35:39
Jesus name, amen. Charles, this has been amazing. Thank you so much, really? All right. Well, that concludes it. You just, that was just amazing, seriously, and it’s been amazing to watch this, this whole journey and transformation and what God has done and weekend and week out that just, you’ve done the work.
36:06
Thanks. I would have to keep doing the work. You know, like, last couple weeks have been horrible to try and do the work. It’s been difficult catching up. But I was I was relieved to know that I got lifetime access, right? Because there’s going to be one just keep gonna go rolling around and wander around. And do I have access to those worksheets to?
36:26
Yeah, let’s see, what does that mean? What do you do? Sometimes
36:28
they’re, like, the accountability for this? Oh, yeah, yeah, I’m gonna build my own, emailed all this stuff. And if I can download them off there, then that’s fine. I’m just gonna make sure that I have access to them. Because I need to build my own cheat sheet. And the thing is to like, my wife gave me about half of these things, already, maybe three quarters of these things on the list. Maybe toward Christmas, she said, the kind of stuff I want everything. And that was only on some of the that was on sort of a set the stability page for her right to keep things stable. But it didn’t give me the how to how to get back in the in the making good progress, and aim to make your smiling and smiles a whole lot more.
37:18
That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Very cool. Charles. Okay, well, um, as you know, the free trainings coming up. So I plan to just shock that full of tons and tons of training, like just so regardless of who comes on the actual program, this free training, I just want God willing, I’m just really praying that lives will be changed. So
37:45
I wanted to just know, I’m using some of your stuff. We’re going to talk in October when we Yeah, that’s right. Yeah, I have talked to my original counselor, and he has really encouraged me to put together I gave him a rough draft of the program. I’m used I’m building because you address a certain issue of it. Yeah, I want to come at it from the perspective of guys that the need for for marriage help in a fair recovery is massive. It’s the scope is astronomical, like, animal Absolutely, probably know, the statistics. But there’s got to be 100,000 cases a month in the States. It’s just insane. You’re right. You’re right. There’s a I’m not gonna pastor again, but I can help people like this. And I want to. So I’ve been told that my ideas are very good. Our area our group doesn’t have anything like that. So I want to use that in helmet. But I would sure love to bring you in with some expert advice. And maybe you can help me do a couple things and point some guys your direction and whatever. That’d be great. I love it. Yeah, I think it’s awesome. Given the ideas you’ve given me like Bella, I can’t tell you how much it changed my head the first time you said a woman need safety. Okay, I have been taught so long that a woman needs security. Security and safety are similar, but they’re a vastly different thing. And just to hear that it triggered so many answers in my head because I have been staring at a puzzle that I did not know the answer for for so long. And all of a sudden, two or three pieces went like this. And everything shifted into place. And all of a sudden I had a path forward and progress to made and answers to help other people with because I was staring at the stuff I knew would work but I was seeing zero progress. And also notes moving so
39:34
ah, praise God. That’s awesome. Yes. So I am totally, uh, you know,
39:39
my I’m so glad that we’re we’re talking October I mean my my stuff is jam packed until then, but that’s perfect. So you know, prep, whatever you need to prep. Let’s get yeah, let’s get.
39:51
The other thing is you’re going to expand if you haven’t already, to the place where you don’t have enough you to go around. Right to help. Do you have you got plans right to hire other people to expand this thing?
40:07
Um, you know, we’ll see how God moves up. But yeah, I mean, yes, there’s, there’s a there’s
40:14
alright. Well, if you ever he, I hope you do, I hope you hire people that will help you in this year because this section of it needs to get bigger. Okay? The lady side of it is critical, okay? And I know it is it’s stretchy, you’ve got a massive ministry there. But changing how men deal with this in their wives will free their women up. And the men are supposed to leave the thing anyway. And we have lost this component of teaching men how to bleed their wives in the sexual department. We have completely abandoned that to the world by and large. And if if you can do whatever you can do to make this bigger, great. I’m just telling you encouraging. It’s made such a difference. I’ve already told like 30 people about your course and who knows maybe someone will sign up. I’ll have to say that yeah. And if you ever want me to jump in and give a one on one testimony of somebody or talk to somebody for you, I’ll be happy
41:13
really? Oh, awesome. Thank you. Appreciate it.
41:17
I got nothing to hide. Okay. And as long as I don’t have to embarrass my wife I’ll be okay. And no I mean that like I need to protect her property and all that but I would you know, I’m not trying to get hired I’m trying to help and so this was a game changer a life changer for me. And that would be you know, you want to throw my my contact information to somebody who just has some questions I’d be happy to help
41:43
that’s amazing. Thank you so much really? All of this Thank you. Okay, well we’ll be talking more soon Oh Charles. Just you know I ended up not ending the recording because with you I always know you’re going to drop like jewels at the end of the call of course you are so there were some real jewels at the end here that I’m curious Would you be open to me using as well? I might Yeah.
42:07
Okay all right. God bless let’s start by Wow
42:23
incredible well all glory and praise and credit to God I mean you know as well as I am I do I am very imperfect so for God to use my stuff is a yes is quite a I don’t know when we are weak again when we are weak he is strong. So I just praise God for Charles story and I’m so impressed with the man he has changed into and and the different Yeah, I mean just faithfulness of growth that he has done and and what God has done in their marriage is amazing. Alright, so again, I hope you will join me at the men’s masterclass free and live and especially with with everything being online now. Everything’s better live. So my hope is that you will actually come on live with me. And there’s going to be some q&a times there’s gonna be a lot of teaching and you know, I’m not gonna make a boring I’m just not because my husband’s gonna be honest with me. All right. All right. I’m praying for you. Thank you for praying for me. And let’s talk next week. God bless. Oh, to sign up. Go to delight your marriage.com/mins training. I almost forgot. All right. Talk to you next week. Love you. Bye.