Podcast: Play in new window | Download
If you are wondering why she won’t initiate or she doesn’t have passion when you do…
Here are a few things you may be missing.
Too many men reach out to me and work with me that need this.
If we really believe the Bible, then its instruction will solve the “unsatisfied sexually” dilemma in your marriage, too!
Spoiler alert: Being the spiritual leader is a turn-on for your wife!
Here’s why.
- Maybe it didn’t matter to her early in your relationship, why would it matter now?
Here’s how.
- What does being the spiritual leader mean? What would help her to feel like you’re filling that role?
And here are practical insights to give grace that will motivate her. (JFYI, I fall prey to the issues all women fall prey to which cause us to lose focus on priorities, too).
- How do you help her in a way that motivates and does not repel or bring distance between you two?
You’ll also hear from a missionary in a remote, hard-to-reach country about how his marriage lacked passion and frequency, but he shares what he was getting wrong, and how you can get it right.
Also, that missionary went through the free masterclass back 3 or so months ago.
We are accepting registrants again so, if you’re not yet signed up, the free men’s masterclass is coming up next week Monday, July 19 – Wednesday, July 21st! Register asap.
This only happens a couple of times a year, so I encourage your to put it on your calendar and be sure you’re registered!
After the free Men’s Masterclass, you’ll have the option to enroll in the full, 3-month Masculinity Reclaimed program, opening July 22nd.
So sign up for the free masterclass, and you’ll get all the details to sign up for the Masculinity Reclaimed program!
Blessings,
Belah
PS –
The free Men’s Masterclass starts July 19 at 11am, and will be accessible for about one week.
transcript
0:02
Welcome to the delight your marriage podcast. You’re joining me belah rose as I dive deep into the beauty, power and truth about intimacy, learn not only the practicals, but the heart behind what making love is all about. delight your marriage. Hi, there, this is Bella, thank you so much for joining. I don’t take it lightly that you invite me into your ears, whether it’s every week, or every couple weeks, whenever it is, you know, I have been told that my podcasts are really true to the name that I put on them. And that is really a wonderful compliment, because I want to meet your expectations and serve you in the way that you need. And so today’s podcast is about motivating her towards intimacy. Now I do have an end game in mind. I’ll just tell you upfront, I have a men’s free masterclass coming up. Right away. It is literally starting next Monday, July 19. And I only run these things two to three times a year, something along those lines. And so the last masterclass had really phenomenal responses. And it’s a lot of work for me and the delight your marriage team, all of which are graduates actually. And they’re in there interacting with your responses, and you have an opportunity of getting prizes, even coaching with me. And so it’s it’s a phenomenal experience. If you weren’t able to make the last one, maybe you signed up but you weren’t able to swing it for whatever reason. Some people are vacation and they email me afterwards like, is there any way I can? I can take it and I just I can only say No, you’ll have to wait till next time because that’s yeah, we got to do that for everyone. So yeah, sign up now. Get it on your calendar, I assume it’s going to be an hour per lesson. So the 19th 20th or 21st. It’ll be released at 11am. Eastern Standard Time, you’ll have about a week to complete all the coursework. And if you decide this free masterclass is, you know, it’s just a taste. But it’s a very big amount of free value for you. But if you decide you want to move forward with the masculinity reclaim program, which you have heard about on my podcast many times, but you’re also going to hear some more transformational stories. But if you decide to move forward with that, after the masterclass, we will start enrolling July 22 For this cohort, so definitely get on the list. So you’ll get all the information for that enrollment into masculinity reclaimed. And again, that only opens a couple of times a year. And it’s amazing, the miracles that we get to witness and a lot of men do the program without their wife even knowing because they know that if she knew she would be suspect, and I don’t disagree with that. It’s yeah, some some men have told their wives and either she hasn’t allowed them to move forward or when they have move forward. She again is suspect of everything that he does. And they’ve told me that so I would encourage you to pray through, definitely do the Freeman’s masterclass. And then if you want to move forward, pray about it. How and if to talk to her about it. Because that’s important for you to discern ahead of time. Okay, let’s talk about how to motivate her towards intimacy.
4:03
So because I’m a woman, I absolutely fall prey to this line of thinking. You know, a lot of men, just because I work with men, and I talk to them every work day, and they give me their unfiltered ideas around sex and intimacy. And I’m so grateful for those perspectives, because then I can kind of translate those from a woman’s perspective to a man’s perspective and vice versa because I also work with men, women separately. But what what I love about being a woman and helping men Translate is because I fall prey to the same, the same things. And so, you know, I like to throw myself under the bus in in my podcast because I want you to know that if it happens to me, it happens to other women. So let’s first of all talk about why a woman would not be making love to her husband? Why would she not want to make love to her husband? Well, there are several things that block her libido, if you will, one, one major thing is that they just don’t have a good relationship overall. And so if they don’t have a good relationship overall, there is not a driving force for her to go towards sex in the same way that men are naturally motivated towards sex. I find there is a very different quality of what happens to a woman before marriage and after marriage. So so maybe a woman outside of marriage? Yeah, maybe she’s got a lot of sexual intrinsic desire. And that’s what you see in the world. But when a wife is married, she now has a very different priority schema in her head. She’s not thinking about attracting a man or keeping a man or any of those things. She’s much more focused on how do I run a home? How do I take care of a family? How do I raise my children? How do I honor God with my life, and I definitely think some of those things are in her mind before marriage, especially depending on her spiritual walk before she gets married. But after marriage, there is a opportunity for her to relax and, and not have to be fighting for her feeling like she has self worth in the eyes of a man whether that’s, you know, that’s not a godly perspective anyway, but it is a common perspective that women battle with and so that but then also, you know, when you look in the world, and you see, you know, these music videos, and these, I don’t know, whatever type, whatever genre of music, that makes it clear, the woman is desiring sex, you’re like, This doesn’t make sense. Why doesn’t my wife desire sex like these other women do? There’s a, okay, I can relax, I can focus on what’s really priority in life. And she’s not wrong. You know, obviously, the health and safety of your children is more important than how many times you have sex in the week. I mean, she’s not wrong in her mature, you know, looking maturely looking at the family. But she is missing the vital nature of sexual intimacy and what that plays, and how that plays out in a marriage. And that that is the way her husband feels loved. And so she is she is missing the priorities of it and how important it is. But if it’s between her children, you know, starving and, and you all making love, I mean, obviously, she’s gonna pick the correct thing of making sure her children are not starving. Why it’s important for you to understand what switch was flipped. Now that she’s been married for however long you all have been married, it’s important for you to kind of have grace with her her perspective. Because if you don’t understand, you’re going to have this chip on your shoulder of like, oh, my gosh, she trapped me. You know, here, she attracted me with all her sexiness and, you know, made it clear that she was into me whether or not you had sex before marriage. And now it’s like nothing’s zero. And so, what I have come to realize is that women need to be known, safe and wholeheartedly cherished, for them to respond, to want to make love to their husband.
9:14
And when we think about the word safety, that covers a lot, really, it covers who he is, as in his character. So we think about is he trustworthy? Can she trust Him that that he is leading the family spiritually? Because when I mentioned blocks, that’s a huge block. Like if she feels like the weight of eternity is on her shoulders. That’s not really what she’s supposed to bear. You get to have that responsibility. God gave it to you. I didn’t. And yes, she is You know, don’t to do her very best, but it’s not really fair that she’s going to pull it all. And you’re going to kind of just let her do it that doesn’t allow her to relax, and feel at ease. That you’re, you’re caring about their family spiritually. What does that look like practically, that you’re in the word, that you’re spending time with Jesus, that you’re making sure that your focus is on him, that you’re making sure you’re memorizing scripture, that you’re grabbing her hand to pray, when something difficult is happening in your lives, or there’s a person that you love suffering, you grab her hand and you pray, you make sure that the family prays, whether it’s before meals, or at bedtime, or that you instigate a devotional, where you are the one that you know, something super simple, like there’s a free app called YouVersion. While you version, and there’s tons and tons of daily devotionals that you can, you know, search for a topic or even. This is what I just did the other day is Mike, we finished one and then I asked my kids to pick the next one. So they are kind of intrinsically invested in the next one we choose because they picked it. So they want to hear what that one was. And there’s different pictures and the whole thing. So but yeah, it’s just as simple as you’re the leader of it, that helps her to relax knowing that, okay, she can trust you. You have your eye on the spiritual development of the home, she wants you to be the spiritual leader, you know, I talked to someone the other day. And we were just laughing about like, yes. When he’s the spiritually leader, it is literally a turn on. It is literally a turn on, I think God made it that way. It’s a, it’s a motivating for men, if they realize this is the safety the she can relax, and know that you love her and you’re taking care of her and the family, spiritually, that safety. And yes, financially, that is important, right? That that is an important part of safety. But it’s not, honestly, it’s not the most important thing. You can provide safety in the home, by being the primary caretaker of the kids full time. And in, quote, income is not going through your physical job, but what you are responsible for, is taking care of the family. So maybe you’re taking care of the family financially, or maybe you’re taking care of the family by making sure their laundry is done. And they take a shower, you know, every couple of days at least, and they brush their teeth and they go to the dentist appointment or if they’re sick, they get whatever care they need, like that is taking care of the family. And that is still filling that safety part that she needs in her life. Another thing about safety is whether or not she sees you judging others. And I think a lot of men overlook, that’s an aspect of your character, which again, if you’re, you know, close to Jesus, and you read the word, you know that gossip poisons. And so she knows that too. And so if you’re gossiping, even if she’s a gossip or two, I mean, you know, even if that’s a normal part of the culture of your marriage,
14:03
what happens is she knows that you judge people, and so when you judge people in front of her now she knows that if you’re going to talk badly about someone else, you’re also going to be talking badly about her. And so that has got to be something you stop doing so that she feels more safe. So just to just to be clear, I really believe that the the quote i i took most of it from Aristotle I tweaked it a little bit and it says this, you are what you continually do. Excellence sorry, that’s his. You are what you continually do character then is not an act, but a habit. You are what you continually do character then is not an act, but a habit. And this is true in science. When they look at the brain brain plasticity that you may have thought a certain way for a very long time. And then when you change, it takes a little while, it’s almost like your mind was going in a certain direction, and it’s well grooved in that direction. That way of thinking, and it’s been doing that it’s almost like a highway of neurons firing across. But when you change it, when you start to become different in the way you think and act, then it’s almost like your neurons start going down a different direction. And it’s, you know, at first a dirt road. But if you keep it up, it’s going to become a paved road, and then it’s going to be a two lane road, and then it’s going to be a four lane highway, and then pretty much that’s just natural, it just becomes natural. And so that, I think, is the message of the Bible. You know, the more you renew your minds, the more different you become. The more you renew your mind, the more different that you become a different person. You’re working out your salvation, you you are having intentionality of becoming more like Christ. What does this have to do with intimacy, everything, everything she needs to know that you are a good man. See, every time I talk to women, about the men that do my program, their wife doesn’t know. He’s in the program, and she starts making love to him, even after decades of them not being connected in this way. Why does that speak to women? Because they know the only way she would do that the only way is if he became a good man. And she could trust it, that he became different by his consistent work on himself. And then she was attracted to who he became. Why do I think it’s important to be in a program, because you need other men to help you along this journey? I don’t think men maybe anyone really changes in a vacuum. I think it was important that God left us as a church. And there’s plenty of times in the Bible that it says do not stop meeting together, I think it’s important that we meet together. And I think if anything taught us COVID There has been a lot of of societal, sad times with us being isolated from other humans. And so yeah, so So sometimes you may be getting similar stuff that I talk about in a podcast. But if you’re not in community, with other men spurring you on encouraging you giving you their celebration, saying, Gosh, this is working, guys, keep it up, don’t, don’t slow down, don’t Don’t stop, keep going. And then they see their breakthroughs. So that’s totally aside, but it is part of it is important because I only create programs that change lives, by God’s grace, and what I get to witness. One really important part about your character is appreciation, genuine appreciation. So I told you in the beginning, that I am a, I fall prey to this mindset myself of because I’m a passionate woman, and I have passionate in terms of I love many things deeply. And I get stirred up about things that I see as in justices in the world, or I see as, you know, ways that I think people should be different, and I get passionate about it. And, you know,
19:02
it’s a it’s a blessing, but I also have to be careful of it. But anyway, the point is that I easily can get my my attention focused on something totally different than priorities. I know that God is first priority, and no, my husband is my first human assignment. And I know sex is vital to our relationship and even who he is as a man and who he is as a dad and who he is in all the different areas of his life. But all that to say is I get distracted. I get distracted by many things, right? Just like Mary and Martha, you know, lots of things get on my mind. I got lots of goals. I’m learning tons of things or I just have struggles for whatever reason, you know, maybe a difficulty with a relationship or a friendship or maybe a difficulty in In the way my work is, you know, going or disorganized or who knows what, but it’s impacting me. And when my husband is genuinely appreciative of what I do for him and intimacy, it actually motivates me to do more. So when men forget that, and they don’t say anything after intimacy, whether it’s that day or the next day, or a couple days later, when he is silent, in her head, she’s like, Oh, he’s fine. Or oh, he, you know, he didn’t matter to him that we did that anyway. So, you know, why, why continue. And I noticed that in my own hearts, and it’s not that I want to blame my husband for not giving me enough, thanks. But in some ways, it’s just natural to move towards something that you feel you’re winning in. So if she feels like she’s not good enough, or she’s not satisfying you, or, Oh, my gosh, it’s been three times where you haven’t actually had intercourse, it’s been, quote, outer course, or, you know, the lights have been off most of the times these last couple months, or what have you, she is not going to be motivated to do anything else. Because in her mind, she’s going to be like, well, it’s not good enough. So, you know, I’m going to just try to do a different aspect of my life where I am going to win. Because we all go towards things that we feel like we’re good at, or we’re winning. So you want her to feel like she’s winning in intimacy. And in the back of your head, you may be like, but she’s not Bella, we haven’t made love in six months, or we haven’t made love in, you know, you know, a few weeks or, you know, it’s all duty sex for her. The, it holds true, it holds true. What I often hear from men is a bitterness and resentment towards their wives have like, this is her. This is her responsibility as a wife like she’s sending if she’s not making love. And I don’t think that is a empowering, mindset. So sometimes, the cliche is, oh, it takes two to change a marriage. And if that’s your mindset, your hands are tight. Because if your wife isn’t on board with changing your marriage, then you don’t really have any option, do you? Certainly, it’s faster. If it’s two people changing a marriage. Yeah. I mean, because both of you are working and yeah, Bada bing, bada boom. You know, when I have a man in my man’s program and men’s program and a woman in the woman’s program, it is faster, it happens within a blink of an eye just about. But is that empowering for you to have this mindset of she has to work for our marriage to change? Not at all? Not at all. What’s empowering is for you to say, my marriage can change even if I’m the only one who does the work. That’s the empowering mindset.
23:24
So is it empowering for you to say that my wife is sinning? If she is not making wholehearted love to me. Is that empowering to you? Is that empowering for your marriage? Because It’s all her fault? No, it is not. So I don’t really care theologically what it is or isn’t. I’m more into change, how do we make your marriage better and more intimate, more loving? How do we do that is give you the responsibility for changing it. That’s it. Because if you are going to wait around for someone else, to make a change, so that things are better. It’s, you’re you’re sitting on your hands or you’re you’re frustrated, you’re angry, you’re resentment. And the problem with that is it’s actually undermining any possibility for change. And so when you are bitter or resenting her even a tiny, tiny bit, and you’re like mostly I’m appreciative, but just a tiny bit, I’m resenting that is poison. And you can’t have a drop of arsenic in an otherwise perfectly clear water and expect it to be good to drink. You can’t it is poison. So what you have to do is rid yourself of that bitterness and resentment that has been built up for probably a very long time, years in the making. I know this isn’t a short thing and I know you have been suffering. I know this has been hard. I know you have felt lonely. But this is not a podcast about just staying in the place that you’re in right now, this is a podcast about helping you and empowering you to change to change your marriage. If I can give that to you, that’s the best gift ever. In fact, there’s a gentleman who’s a missionary who is just now graduating from the Mr. Program. And he actually said, I can read some of the stuff he wrote. So I am. So he says in terms of the biggest marital struggles, he says, when he started the program, lack of physical intimacy was the most obvious issue. But I don’t think it was the biggest one. There was a major struggle on my side to be truly grateful for my wife and appreciate all that she did. I also had a pretty singular view on what sex was and what it should mean to my wife. Definitely unrealistic and unfair expectations of her. Another issue was cutting off my emotions from her. I didn’t realize I was doing this, but the course helped me to realize how much I was hiding my feelings and emotions from her. One thing as I as I read this testimonial, I need you to be focused on what you can learn from his story, because he is giving you jewels, if you focus on it. Let me reread this. I don’t think it was the biggest issue. Lack of intimacy was the most obvious issue, but I don’t think was the biggest issue. There was a major struggle on my side to be truly grateful for my wife, and appreciate all that she did. I also had a pretty singular view on what sex was and what it should mean to my wife. Definitely unrealistic and unfair expectations of her. Another issue was cutting off my emotions from her. I didn’t realize I was doing this. But the course helped me to realize how much I was hiding my feelings and emotions from her. And how were they how are these things negatively affecting him? A lot of distance tension in our relationship. Since I was hiding so much emotional pain from her, it created a gap that she was unaware of. It also was handicapping my efforts of being the spiritual leader in our home. So in what ways have you grown, I’ve grown and older ability, sharing things with my wife that I wouldn’t have thought of sharing before. I’ve grown in my view of sex, realizing there’s much more to it than the masculine side. I’ve grown in playfulness, though, that’s an area that still needs growth. I’ve grown in my spiritual leadership. Now this is a missionary talking just so you know. I mean, if he is growing in spiritual leadership in his home, we can all grow, we can all grow. Anyway, it continues and taking charge of my responsibility in our home to be the spiritual leader. And then what were the biggest celebrations, and he says the biggest celebration, in my mind, was one of the nights that my wife initiated sex. It wasn’t that she initiated it was that she said, we were getting into it. When we were getting into it. She said that she felt like a free woman.
28:12
Okay, so then let’s keep going. Then, throughout the program, how did you show your commitment to the progress I feel like it was mostly small steps that eventually contributed to big gains, doing the daily gratitudes and face statements practicing things like non sexual touch compliments, feminine sexual practices. For me, it was just slowly and surely putting one step in front of the other. I realized I hold a lot of emotion within, and I’m very hesitant to let anyone see it. I’m also rather impatient, wanting to see results immediately, instead of letting them take this course, to take the course and happen, let it happen naturally. And then, he says any additional thoughts? That’s the question for him is a huge thank you for helping me bring my marriage from just okay to being back on the path to being wonderful. One last thing I wanted to mention was how empowering this course is, when I say empowering, I want to refer to the definition of enabling, or rather enabling what is already there. All the power and capability to lead my marriage and be a great husband was already there. God created me to be a fantastic husband. But too often I allowed myself to get hung up on my feelings of failure, and sink into apathy. This course helped me remember that God created me for more, and I have the ability to lead my marriage to a greater strength and intimacy than what I’ve been experiencing before. So thank you. There is a peace and lack of tension that just was not there before. The level of passion in our love life has definitely increased, as well as a natural curiosity of my wife pertaining to physical intimacy. He said though I had my reservations about going into the program initially, I have absolutely no regrets now. It was absolutely the step that I needed to take. And I’m incredibly grateful that God allowed me to take part in it. And then I was asking him if he do an audio interview and or visual, intimate interview, and we may do that in the future, but pretty funny, because he actually posted in our private channel, and I asked him if he would be okay with me reading it out. And he said, Yes. So a couple of weeks after he wrote that he posted the other day, I did the motivational initiating for connection session, my wife flirtatiously teased, saying no, but playful. later on that night, when we started, she wanted to be much more fierce. So upon her request, we delayed the connection session to later I had asked her for some new or old things earlier in the week using the methods in the modules. And she actually did that it was probably the most fierce that I’ve ever seen her. I know was, I know, I was in shock and asked and she asked me if she was doing something wrong, To which I responded very enthusiastically, that she was doing awesome. She mentioned afterwards that she has never felt so unselfconscious in our lovemaking before. I was super excited to hear her say that, and I tried to reinforce that while I was incredibly thankful for what she did in the lovemaking session, I was more happy that she feels she doesn’t have to be self conscious, that she feels free. I’m aiming to have a connection session tonight, it will probably won’t be as exciting as this last time, but I do hope that it’ll be healing for her, which is so great. So this gentleman, like I said, because he’s a missionary, he’s out of the country and doesn’t have the internet speed to do a video testimonial. Otherwise, he’d be open to it. But the most important thing that’s incredible that you should be encouraged by is every little nugget of truth that he shared. And his wife did not know he did the program. And she has changed, their intimacy has changed. Why? Because he’s been truly grateful because he’s worked on his character because he’s worked on his spiritual leadership. And of course, that’s the way women tick. That’s what they want in a man when I talk to women, so you know, for for a long time I’ve done these Clarity Calls with women. Now I have somebody else who does it. Dana, if you’ve heard her testimonial, she does, she’s incredible. But I’ve done these testimonial, sorry, these clarity call interviews with them. And it’s really their unfiltered, almost like, hurts from their husband. And it’s a round character. I have never, in all of my years working in this field. I have never heard a wife, dissatisfied with her husband sighs.
33:09
Women don’t care about that. They don’t. They want to feel safe, known and wholeheartedly cherished. So I want you to understand what matters to her. And that motivates her towards intimacy. Move closer to Jesus, get in the Word. Be grateful for her understand what matters to her, in fill that let her heal. You know what I just read to you. Connection sessions. You know, that’s one of the really wonderful feminine sexual practices that I teach that heals her and helps her to know that you really care about her healing and in sex more than you care about your own orgasm. And that’s kind of an intrinsic thing for women, whether it’s because of society or what but or just your experience together, she feels that sex is about you. And so it’s a duty. But a lot of times you can’t explain it away words can only go so far. actual physical sexual contact that doesn’t lead to orgasm. teaches in a way that your words and ever could. And it’s interesting because you’ll notice from what I just read is that I talk about connection sessions and feminine sexual practices almost towards the end of the course we get into much more sexual stuff towards the end of the course because you have to go through a healing phase that takes time for her to be able to trust you again. For her to be able to trust you if she ever has her hand. Sometimes there’s not a lot of like trauma between you and her like, sometimes it’s really just there’s been misunderstandings and higher expectations, or she’s just felt pressured because of just little tiny underlying things that you didn’t even realize you’re doing tiny tweaks that make a huge difference. But it takes time for her to trust that you’re different, that you appreciate her. And after sex, you say, thank you, and you appreciate her the next day, and a couple days after that. It’s about appreciation. It’s not about pressure. It’s about lowering your expectations that have it’s about forgiving her and taking away the bitterness. Yes, that motivates her to intimacy. Not the pressure, not the pushing, encouraging, sharing the appreciation, and it has to start from your heart. It’s interesting, we, if you’ve listened to my podcast, you know that, you know, we’re still working on parenting, like every parent, right? Because that’s hard. But one of the things we were just talking to our parenting coach about is our concern that our kids getting spoiled. So if we’re so kind, and so loving, you know, are they getting spoiled and, and she had a really good insight around, you know, I wouldn’t call it spoiled, I call it entitlement, you know, if you’re concerned with the entitlement. And when you think about kids, when they’re entitled, when they feel entitled to something, all we do as parents is pull back and not want to give it to them. Right? If they feel entitled that they should go to some amusement park, or they should get to buy food every time they go anywhere, they should get their special toy, you know, all you want to do is say, alright, nevermind, I’m not doing that anymore. Right? It’s that entitlement that makes us naturally resist anyone that is giving or anything. I mean, it’s a natural, like, Wait a second. That’s how it is with your wife. If you feel entitled to her sexuality, it causes her to resist. And that’s a character thing. My husband is so good to not do that. Just because you might listen to my podcast, and you hear oh my gosh, they’re having sex, the frequency of the passion, all these things, and you feel entitled to that for your wife and you, your expectations are raised and all these things. It completely undermines your ability to look at her with grace, and compassion and love and who she is. And the fact that you get to love this woman who is an image bearer of God, walking around in your house,
38:01
how lucky you are, how lucky you are, you’re not entitled to her. You’re not entitled to her what that verse is, is instructive to women. And it’s instructive to men, but don’t look across the street and say, Oh, is she doing her job? It’s not going to help. It’s not empowering. It’s not going to help your marriage. But if you look at your side of the street and say what can I do to love my husband better? What can I do to love my wife better that is going to empower transformation in every part of your marriage. So let me pray for you. Father, you know, the gentlemen listening, you know his heart, you know his situation, you know how hard things have been. And you know what he needed to hear from this podcast episode. If it was one small nugget, if it was a mindset shift, if it was an acknowledgement of his need for you. Lord, I trust that you gave it to him and I trust you Holy Spirit, that you’re speaking to him even now, even the rest of this day. And God, we, we love you. We love what you’re doing here. I pray God, you’d give him a sense of the next step, whether it’s an apology for his wife, whether it’s a compassion he didn’t see before. Give her that grace. Give him that grace to give to her to extend grace to her and help her to heal from maybe their relationship from maybe society’s view of different things that she’s heard or was raised and give her give him the grace to help her heal in the way she needs it. Lord, we love what you’re doing. We trust you. We believe you’re healing this marriage. Jesus name Amen Thank you again for listening. I really do hope that you join me on that free masterclass. Men have said it’s been extremely valuable for them. So go to delight your marriage.com/masterclass and you can sign up again that’s next week, July 19 is when we start so definitely register as soon as you can. God bless you. Thank you for listening. Love you bye