This title was hard to come up with.

 

Essentially, I want you to have the tools and mindset to figure out how to set boundaries with yourself, and with others, when needed.

Jesus was the servant of all. 

He came to serve, not to be served. 

He was the most humble and meek. 

And yet, Jesus set boundaries.

A lot. 

Here are a few, but once you read this, you’ll probably not be able to read a parable or look at the life of Jesus without noticing his leaning into boundaries over and over again. 

Jesus disappointed people because his priority was God over people.

In Mark 1:35-39…

  • Jesus wakes up early to pray, but his disciples come looking for him, saying that, “…everyone is looking for you.”
  • Jesus tells them that they need to go to other towns to preach as well, meaning that he has other priorities and can’t always be available to meet everyone’s needs.

In Matthew 16:21-23…

  • Jesus tells his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer at the hands of the elders, chief priests, and scribes. Peter rebukes him, saying that this should never happen to him.
  • Jesus responds by telling Peter that he is setting his mind on human things rather than God’s things and calls him a hindrance.

In Luke 14:25-33…

  • Jesus sets the boundary of the cost of discipleship. He says anyone who wants to follow him, essentially (compared to their love for Jesus) must hate their family and even their own life. They must carry their own cross, and give up all their possessions.
  • If they’re not willing to pay this price, they can’t follow him.

In John 2:13-17…

  • Jesus clears the temple of the money changers and merchants, telling them to stop making his Father’s house a marketplace.
  • He shows anger and uses physical force to set this boundary.

Jesus was the servant of all but did not allow anyone to trod on boundaries. 

So, what if you are trodding on God’s boundaries?

What if your spouse wants to trod on the boundaries set by God?

Sexual boundaries? 

Disrespect boundaries? 

Other boundaries?

Should you set boundaries with yourself? 

Should you set boundaries with your spouse?

If so, how? 

Is there a way to have a generous heart and a kind spirit and yet set a firm boundary? 

 

This conversation goes into these things that are HARD to tease through. 

I don’t think I have it all right.

This is a topic that I feel a bit reticent to release. And I think it will require prayer as you discern how it applies to you.

And what your next steps are.

 

Love & Blessings,

Belah

 

PS – Let us know if this topic spoke to you and if we can help, email us at belah@delightyourmarriage.com

 

Quote from a program graduate:

I have become a delighted, playful wife that enjoys and desires sex. My relationship to the Lord, my husband and our daughter has become more intimate.”