Learning From The BestHi there! Belah here. Today is Part II of my interview with Keelie Reason of lovehopeadventure.com. Keelie shares how important it is to have mentors in your life and surrounding your marriage to help guide you. When you’re intentional about your friendships they can mean the world to your marital health. Listen in as Keelie shares about her keys to marital success and how important it was watching and learning from her own parents doing marriage everyday.

Check out Part I at delightyourmarriage.com/80
You’ll Discover:

  • How friends can be a vital part of your marital success long term.
  • What mentorship can look like for your marriage.
  • Why it’s worth stopping what you’re doing to really talk to your spouse.
  • How her parents were very sex-positive with her growing up but she still had to fight through obstacles in their intimacy.

 

Get around inspiring people

Books & Resources Mentioned:

 

Tweetables:

  • When you get around other people and you’re intentional about your conversations [you grow].
  • Find people who inspire you and spend time with them.
  • Find another couple who is doing it well and see what they’re doing.
  • We all interpret things differently that’s why self-realization is huge.

 

Thanks for listening! I hope you are encouraged to live in wholehearted intimacy!

 

Love,

Belah

 

Episodes come out Tuesday & Thursday mornings. But, in case you forget…I love to subscribe with my phone so I never miss an episode. You can too:  

 

iPhone: Podcast App is on updated iPhones. Open DYM & subscribe! Android: Download Podbay.fm App. Open DYM & subscribe!

 

If you enjoyed this episode, would you add your review to iTunes (via your phone or computer)? It will encourage me & it will help others find the podcast easier. Find out how at delightyourmarriage.com/itunes Thank you!

 


Transcript

0:02
Welcome to the delight your marriage podcast. This show where you hear from amazing and inspiring wives sharing their struggles, triumphs, and advice for this journey called marriage. Here’s your host belah rose.

0:18
Hey there, and welcome. Thank you so much for joining me today. I don’t know if this is your first time listening. But if it is welcome, this is a podcast where we talk about marriage. We talk about intimacy in marriage, we talk about the good stuff, the hard stuff. So I interview wives and intimacy experts and I try to find out their secrets and how to have a fantastic marriage. So today is no different. I have Keeley reason on this is her second half of the interview. If you haven’t heard the first one, she talks about how life changes and career changes in her husband actually really affected her and caused her to really dive deep and figure out where her identity is and where it should be found. So listen to that. And then today, we’re going to be talking more about how to communicate well how to fight well in your marriage. And we’ve got a lot of cool things to talk about. And I do have a challenge at the end for you. Now I want to share an email or a message that I got recently from a listener and I’m just gonna share parts of it because it was a it was a generous long emails, I really appreciated it. But it says Hi, belah I recently found your podcast about a couple months ago. And I can’t even put into words how much your podcast has positively affected my life. I appreciate so much all of the courage you show every time you put yourself out there in the interviews. And each time you publish a podcast, your voice is so soothing, and your personality and attitude is so comforting. I love how you treat each guest as if they were a family member. It’s evident that you respect each and every one of them, regardless of their past and you don’t judge them. I think you’re setting a great example for many people out there. And it’s simply amazing. And I am excited to catch up on the rest of the episodes. Well, thank you so much for that awesome message that really encouraged me. If you haven’t gotten a chance to review the podcast on iTunes. That would be such a treat. If you could do that for me. Go to delight your marriage.com/itunes to find out how if you’re not sure how. Okay, well, let’s go ahead and jump into the interview. And I will talk to you on the other side

2:33
the next part of this is how your marriage looks like now, what is what is it like now after this this season, the struggle?

2:41
Well, I’d say we’ve really got ourselves into gear. Jar of last this past year, maybe like end of 2013 starting 2014 or 2015. I mean, so the end of 2014 2015. We’re in a new year. So probably somewhere around the start of 2015, I started looking around and realizing that we were coming out of the funk, just individually. Our jobs were becoming more defined, our income was becoming more stable, our earning opportunities were just growing. And I started going wow, God really brought us through this. And for me, I just kind of had to ignore a lot of the things I was feeling during that because I think I don’t know if all women are this way, but I think a lot of us can obsess about stuff. So that’s about a problem. It just makes it like 10 times worse. Yep, yeah, me obsessing about everything really did help me I just was like, I’m going to focus on my stuff. And then I woke up one day and realized that we had really come a long way and that our team work started to return I think it may be naturally started because we were we had both been like working in spite of the other person just like okay and teamworking tendencies that we’ve always had just kind of started naturally resurfacing and we do have a phrase around here we we say Go Team reason. My husband is on has to say this a lot because I am the fighter. I will not lie. I am the fighter. Like we’re gonna keep the peace and I’m like, No, I’m gonna have a fight. Show. off my hustle. I leave remind me Go Team reason. That’s awesome. Late Night. Okay, Keeley. You’ve you are not We have a team mindset. And this past year, we have like in grown incredibly, as a couple mean, like by leaps and bounds. I didn’t even think that that could happen, given the fact that, like, we have been in relationship for 18 years as of Monday. So that’s awesome. If you still celebrate random date. I love it. Yes. So I was like, There’s no way we’re gonna be able to grow much more than what we have. But it’s been pretty crazy. We have had to, like, do so much self evaluation this past year. Some of it is because of circumstances in our life. Some of it has been because I have been writing over on my blog about marriage relationships. And so it’s made me sit back and go, Why do I do everything I do in my marriage? So I can explain it to other people? Yeah, we we really have grown a lot. We’re much tighter team probably than we’ve ever been. And our communication, I felt like we communicated pretty well. But then it’s like, just hit a new level this year. And I think some of our communication changes have been because we have both understood ourselves so much better. We went through that that identity crisis, and we had to really evaluate who we are, why we do what we do what we say. And because of that, part of our communication increase has been that we understand why we feel the way we feel, and we’re able to communicate that to the other person better. If not, can’t communicate with someone if you can’t even identify your own feelings and share that. Mm

6:53
hmm. Yeah. Yeah. It’s, it’s, it’s a key point of communication, you really have to know yourself to be able to know what’s going on to be able to relay that to the other person. Mm hmm. I want to ask you, so for a wife listening, when she’s like, I really want our relationship to grow. But I don’t have a blog. I’m not a writer. I don’t I don’t have a map for this, do you have some tips on how she can encourage her marriage to grow?

7:23
Well, I think that what has really helped my marriage to grow this year is by being in relationship with other couples and just conversing with them. Because when you get around other people, and you’re intentional about your conversations, okay, so how do you handle this in your marriage? Or how do you deal with that in your marriage? Or, you know, my spouse did this thing. And it’s frustrating me, it’s the same kind of thing you do with kids? Like, how do you raise your kid? How do you get your kid to go to the bathroom, or whatever. That is a great way to build your marriage, because you’re hearing other people’s ideas. You’re really, you’re really having to do a lot of self reflection on your own to say, Okay, this is why we do this. And, you know, you can read books all day long. I think that’s wonderful. But you relationship is so important. You can’t do your marriage in a bubble.

8:23
Yeah, yep, yep, yep. I really love some of the friendships I have through my, through our church. And that’s a way you can make these relationships is through church. So if you’re not plugged into a local church, get plugged in to a church, you know, shop around for a little bit and find one that, you know, you’re able to connect with it preaches the word of God, but get in these relationships, I so agree, and I’m so grateful for these friendships that I have. Because every as we’ve talked about, I mean, every marriage will go on rough seasons rough times, and you need friends around you that are going to remind you of the vows that you made of the reason he’s wonderful of the reasons you need to stick this out. And, and, and help you to do that. Because I know that if ever there was an issue in our marriage, and I like came to these friends and said, Listen, I’m thinking about leaving, they would be like, what? And they would help me remind me of any of all the reasons that would not be okay. And you need people that are going to look you in the face and say things like that. So put yourself in that situation before you ever need it.

9:26
Mm hmm. That is such a great wisdom right there. Because how many people get in the middle of marital crisis and have zero friends? That’s not the time you’re going to be like, I think I’m gonna make new friends. Yeah, no, you’re not.

9:42
Yeah. Because they don’t know they don’t know the history of the two of you. They don’t know what’s going on, or what has gone on or what who you who you are, but if you if you make those friendships now, investing in your marriage, long term that’s going to be those are investments that are going to You know, have great rewards when you need them. I think that’s awesome. Yeah. Okay, so then, um, if you think about the chief, three things that have been central to your marital success, what would you say?

10:14
Well, first of all, mentorship is, like, I’m finding been the number one thing that has been our marriage, the key to our marital success. And we’re really fortunate that my mom and dad have invested in me intentionally investing in us as a couple intentionally. Since I was a teenager, I mean, my mom and dad, were just giving me marital advice long before I ever even needed it, you know. And they’ve continued to do that for us. As we’ve gone on, in our marriage, my parents make sure that, you know, we have the time to spend together as a couple. So they’ll take my kids every now and then. And, but mentorship is so huge. So maybe don’t have a mom and dad that can do that for you, but find other people that inspire you, and spend time with them. You don’t have to come into it and be like, Hey, will you be my mentor, but just find or identify another couple that is doing it well, and get around them and see what they’re doing? Because I mean, the mentor aspect of things is so central. This is why I think so many couples end up having to go to marriage counseling, because they don’t have any relationship with anyone. And I’m not against marriage counseling whatsoever. I’m just saying, like, I think it’s, if you can’t find someone to mentor you, then maybe counseling is your best option. Yeah, you just need guidance, we all

11:52
do. I love that you have a, you know, a marriage that you’ve grown up with, that you’ve been able to see, been able to see how they struggle and how they work things through and how they enjoy marriage together as well. And I think that I mean, honestly, that was one of the biggest reasons I started dy M is because I grew up in a really broken marriage, my parents divorced when I was in my 20s. But the marriage was broken long before that, they, you know, they had a lot of ways of handling things that was not healthy. And, and so that I needed to learn and see marriages that have stood the test of time that have done this for 1520 30 years, you know, and really understand how they did that and understand their tips and their keys and their insights and their wisdom. And so I just encourage you, listener if, if this is something you know, you feel a little desperate that you know, you don’t know marriages that have stood the test of time and you’re scared that yours won’t, I just encourage you, one, I encourage you to continue listening to do I am because that’s really my purpose here is to is to help give you a vision of success in your marriage. But number two is seek them out. Because I think Keeley has really touched upon a great point here is that if you if you have this, this idea of being mentored by whatever, you know, God puts in your path, you’re going to be seeking that out, you’re going to be in this mode of learning to be a great marital partner, instead of being in this mode of we’re fine, we’re gonna figure this out, or we’ll do it by ourselves or something. So if you just kind of put on that mindset of I want to learn I want to be a student of marriage, I want to do this well godly, God honoring marriage, I think he’s going to honor that I think he’s gonna bring people to you that will be able to show you what we’ll be able to teach you. Yeah, because that’s really his goal. That’s his will. He wants a great marriage for you. He wants the two to become one. He designed it this way. It makes all of us better. So okay, so now I want to go to number two. Go ahead.

13:59
Yeah, I like I already talked on learning to communicate, that is so huge, not just talking. But talking to understand and part of the communication, the key to communication has been understanding your spouse based off of who they are. You can’t, you have to listen through their form of communication, not just the way you do it. And we all have different communication styles. And we all interpret things differently based off of who we are, our personalities, the way we grew up or whatever. So that’s why that self realization of how you what’s going on inside of you, and sharing that with your partner. That’s a huge part of the communication.

14:46
Yeah, that’s really good. I like that again, thinking about based on who they are. So thinking about your spouse and how they relate to the world and I really love that that’s a very servant oriented view. of marriage where you’re trying to figure out how I can best communicate to my husband versus, you know, he should be able to understand me, you know, we’re not compatible, blah, blah, blah, instead of, no, I’m going to learn how I can communicate best to you. I think that’s really wise. Kelly, I love that.

15:18
Yeah, I mean, if it would be like, with our kids, you would definitely change the way you spoke to a child versus an adult. So we should be willing to do that for other adults and, you know, speak to someone in a way that you know, is going to resonate with them.

15:35
Yeah, that’s really good.

15:38
And I would say that be a team. That’s, that’s another key part of marriage. And I see a lot of couples struggle with that. I’ve struggled with it. Obviously, when you stop being on the same team together, you look at the other person as your enemy, and you are not, you’re just gonna destroy each other. Yeah, I mean, there’s nothing wrong with fighting, but if your opponent’s in a fight, very different than being teammates in a fight.

16:07
Yeah. Yeah, that’s true. No, when when you say there’s nothing wrong with fighting, like, I’m sure you have a context of like, how you understand fighting. So if someone’s trying to understand maybe a good fight versus a bad fight? What advice would you give them? Well, my mom

16:25
always called them we have heated discussions. Fighting i, she’s like, it’s okay to be passionate in your words, and what you say and work through a problem, it is not okay to tear the other person down, and to bring up a lot of past things, but it is okay to get into a discussion that gets a little heated, a little debate, you know, like, between candidates or something, we can’t be hurling insults at one another. But if you’re not ever fighting, it probably means you’re not really communicating. Because you’re never having a discussion that, you know, somebody walking away feeling frustrated about? Hmm, probably not really communicating honestly, to each other.

17:15
Do you have any guidelines for how to communicate in a way that? Yeah, that makes it a heated discussion.

17:23
I would say that, anytime my husband and I start having a conversation that starts getting a little bit heated, and be the other person is getting defensive or reacting. We try to stop what we’re doing, and realize we’re probably not communicating ourselves very well. So we need to be reevaluate that. Yeah. And it’s okay to share your opinion. It is, it’s okay to walk away and go, I didn’t agree with him on that. You don’t have to always be in agreement about everything, but we are not yell at each other, we’re not gonna shout at each other, we’re not gonna, you know, get physical or say awful things that have nothing to do with what we’re talking about. The whole purpose of that discussion is to figure out what the root problem is. And normally, it’s not got anything to do with that thing that you just got frustrated about. I mean, there was recently something that happened to me, my husband and myself, I had ran out to get some supper, he was setting up our table for us to eat. I came back and he had put a candle holder there. And I was like, Oh, I’m just gonna put this up, because I don’t think it’s needed. And that really hurt his feelings. Well, two years ago, I’ve had no clue why in the world, that would have bothered him. But he was able to share with me, okay, this is why it bothered me. And I was able to go okay, I get that and apologize. You know, that house can handle the future. It could have been a big fight, though. Yeah, if we hadn’t, you know, learned how to communicate better.

19:07
Yeah. Yeah, I love so. So a couple things I want to pick out that you said was, first of all, when you start to realize that the other person is having some emotion about what’s going on, stop what you’re doing. And, and that’s, you know, maybe seems obvious, but I think it’s really key because that’s honoring the other person’s emotions, what they’re going through and to realize, okay, this is something that we need to take time to focus on. And so whatever you’re cooking, or you’re doing something for the kids or whatever, stop what you’re doing, or I guess the other option is to pick a time to figure this out later. So maybe, you know, I really want to focus on this do you think we could talk about in a couple minutes, so then they feel heard they feel respected, and you can’t stop changing the diaper for example, and you can focus on it later. Which I’ve got to I’ve got two toddlers I’ve got a well not quite toddler, but I’ve got a two two A year old and a one year old, a two and a half year old. And so I. So yeah, I’ve got lots of diapers going on recently that we had a big diarrhea issue. And so there’s a lot of diapers in this house. That’s so hard. I know those darn diapers, once they get out of that I’m really looking forward to it. But I do okay, so the other thing I wanted to ask you about is, is recognize that there’s something at the root of the issue. So like you said, you know, the candle thing is just like a fruit, it’s just this outward understanding of what’s happening. Like it’s an outward sign of, there’s something deeper going on, and him getting upset about the candle, I’m sure you know what the root was. And that’s probably much deeper

20:46
than the candle I come in. And without really seeing effort that he put into something, I just go and start changing things. Through it was me just not respecting the effort he put into something and basically saying your idea wasn’t a good one. So I’m in a good shape. And that’s what I was saying. I had my reasons, I felt like the candles needed to be changed out. And I didn’t want to do all that work. Right. But that is that was what I was communicating to him in that gesture.

21:23
Right, right. And I think having that long vision of like, okay, let’s figure out what is really going on here versus Well, the candle thing is stupid, you know, like getting that? Well, he shouldn’t, he should know that. This is a silly little thing. I think that’s yeah, which is so easy. I mean, I could give you plenty of examples of my own marriage, that’s the same thing where it just seems like, well, he shouldn’t feel that way. Because this is such a silly little, whatever. But the truth is the root, you know, we need to be respecting and honoring our husband. He’s super sensitive to that. So so how can we respect and honor him more and recognize this this issue? There’s something bigger at the root. So I love that. I love that so much.

22:03
It’s never about the socks on the floor. Yeah, you’re here.

22:09
That’s right. There’s something bigger? Great. Well, okay. So speaking of bigger things, and things that are important in marriage, I want to ask you if you could share a tip or advice about intimacy that maybe you wish someone let you in on earlier or something that was just helpful for you to understand.

22:25
Okay. Well, fortunately for me, I had parents that are very sex positive, they talk all the time about sex. I know, everybody’s like, really, your parents did that? Absolutely. We had the call, there wasn’t the talk. It was like an ongoing conversation for years. Wow. And parents just really wanted me to know for sure that sex is God’s design, there’s nothing dirty about it, there’s nothing wrong with it. And it was created for marriage, it’s healthy in marriage, you should want it, do it, desire it. And it’ll be good. And so I came into the marriage with a very good understanding of sex, which was really, really helpful for our sex life. Because I had that sex positive thing. However, it does mean that I didn’t deal with my own issues about sex. And, again, it was another one of those, we didn’t communicate ourselves. Well. I remember having two kids 18 months apart, back when my kids babies, and I mean, I can tell you at the end of the day, I was exhausted, taking care of babies all day long. And, and I love my husband, but he hates to go to bed at night. So he’s always very, you know, very late going to bed and I can’t get out him. I can’t stay asleep if he’s not in there. So a lot of times he would want to go to bed very late. And I knew I’m getting up a couple hours with kids. So I need in the bed and go straight to sleep now. And I happen is I I would be more than willing to have sex. I mean, any time I would have been more than willing, and I kept my my libido or my, you know, being in the mood all day, like I would set on it like, Hey, I’m ready, if you want to work. Like I’ll keep that on center for him. And then as I go on, I feel like he gives me no signs that he was bid and you know, and so it gets to be late and I like cut that off. We get in bed and he would look over and be like hey, and I think now kitchens. Okay. We’re all afternoon. You didn’t share any interest whatsoever. So I would say not tonight. Now. He would. He definitely took that as huge rejection because I wasn’t trying to I didn’t want to be awful. like no, I would always try to go back to them within a day and initiate but I really stunk at initiating sex. I was really just it was hard for me. It was just, it was not something I felt comfortable with a sex positive as my, my was, you know as much as as much as I enjoyed my intimacy with my husband initiating felt so weird.

25:28
It wasn’t totally feel weird. I definitely hear that. Yeah,

25:31
it is. It’s so hard. If I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how to get this ball rolling. Yeah, the biggest change in our life because my husband feeling rejected, because this is going on for, you know, years. He says years. Really Sure. Because, again, it was a community thing. Like I said, we’re not interested in sex. I just wasn’t interested in sex at midnight when a baby’s gonna get up in two hours. So, yeah, I changed my mindset. And I said, we’re going to have sex every other day, and either ate it, or he’s going to initiate it. But this way, is, you know, if I’m going to initiate it, if I’m going to keep from telling him not tonight, obviously, the ball needs to be in my court. I’ve got a process. I’ve got to put myself on simmer. You know? I, if it had been a day, I was like, okay, one way or the other. We’re having sex tonight. So I’m going to start letting him know, I have sex, and I’m gonna let him know earlier on in the night. Hey, this is our night. Nice. Because we’re going to be intimate tonight. And I changed. The other mindset that he changed was that again, I was mom, two little babies. And I felt like I was not a grown up whatsoever. I felt like I was a babysitter, a housekeeper. Yeah. Fierro escapes in from motherhood. And then I started realizing that my time with my husband was that escape. It was my escape. Mama, I could go and do this very grown up very adult thing with my wife and saying I didn’t have to get a sitter.

27:20
Oh, I love that. Yes. Okay. So a couple things I want to just mention that I really love. As you said, you talked about putting yourself on simmer. I think that’s such a great way of talking about getting yourself ready. Because that does we have to as women need to get ourselves ready prepared for sex and you know, men, they turn on like a light switch, they’re like, easy peasy. But for us, we need to we need to have ourselves in the mode of okay, intimacy is happening soon, I’m gonna be a little more sexy, I’m gonna wear special lingerie, I’m gonna make sure I take a shower, or whatever it is to make you feel like you’re gonna get ready to have sex. That’s awesome. And then the other thing, I love that you were super proactive. So you made yourself a goal. You’re said every other day we’re gonna have sex. And I think as women we really, I mean, I talked about this in its Episode 69, actually, that it’s called Sex, how much is enough. And I kind of talked about my fear, my philosophy on you know, getting yourself prepared for sex and like how to, as a wife, make yourself feel more saucy in the moment, you know. And so that’s kind of my take on that. So if you want to go back and listen to it, feel free. I love that, you know, that was kind of your, your mode of being really proactive on getting your sex life in order. And especially since you know that that’s so important from your parents. So I love that. And then and then the other thing you mentioned was you This is your time of escape, to designate this as a really good thing for you as out of mommy mode into adult time mode. So I want to ask you, specifically due to the marriage that you’ve had, what opportunities have you had to serve and get to know God?

29:02
Well, my husband has, he’s been a pastor for a number of years. And that obviously has given us a lot of opportunities to serve God. But in our dating life, we were very intentional about serving the Lord finding ways to volunteer together. We worked at a children’s camp for a while, in fact, we actually went, got married and worked at a children’s camp, two summers in a row right out the gay plus we had done some volunteering with him prior to that. So for us, we have just been very intentional, finding this opportunities to serve God and being open to the opportunities that he gives to us and my husband is the director of the food pantry now. So we see a lot of people come through there have the ability to serve them. It’s opened up a lot of doors in our community for us to Talk to people just kind of get out there. Get to know people. But I would say that being very intentional is important. As far as serving.

30:14
Yeah. Yeah, that’s good. So is there a book or a program that you would specifically recommend?

30:25
Yeah, I was kind of thinking that over. And I wasn’t really coming up with a whole lot in line with what I’ve talked about today, with the exception of initiating and your sex life more that can be so, so hard. And currently, on my website, I have a list of bedroom games that I put together and they’re all free. printables Oh, fun. A lot of like foreplay moves and things like that. And I created our first bedroom game probably like two years ago, before I ever even opened the blog. It was so awesome. Because pressure off of me in the bedroom, it was like, Okay, I want to be sexy. But what does that even mean? I don’t even know. Right? I want to have fun. I want to go outside the box with you. I don’t know what to do. So I husband and I we brainstormed a lot for those bedroom games. And they’re at love hip adventure.com/bedroom games. And they really, I was surprised they’ve really helped my marriage even though I created the game. Haha, that’s awesome. It really just kind of takes out that guesswork out of what should we do now? Well, what’s the hard say to do. And in that same thread, the dating divas.com They have a lot of bedroom games. There. They are huge inspiration for love adventure. I followed them for a long time before I started my website. And they have a lot of fun dating ideas they give you free printables has got like a community you can pay for a membership for they do a couple other things. And I love it because they give you romantic date idea nights they give you like practical, let’s go have fun as a couple. They also have like some couple date ideas. Those would be my top resources for developing intimacy, just being better friends, that kind of thing. Oh, that’s awesome.

32:33
I love that. Okay, I found bedroom games on your website, you know it all. Okay, the link is just a little different. It’s bedroom hyphen games. So we’ll have it linked up on delight your marriage if you want to go there, and you can just click okay, well, my final question for you is about if you could go back to your first year of marriage and sit yourself down? What’s one piece of advice that you would give to you?

32:55
Well, I would say that I would, I should initiate sex more. Because that is definitely something that it’s really important that I would be more willing to let my husband be who he is, and make his own decisions, even if I don’t agree with them. And to just remember that I’m a team with myself. There’s gonna be days when I don’t want to be on the same team. But I keep that mindset.

33:29
Hmm. Yeah, that’s really good. I love that. So if you could also share where our audience can find and connect with you online.

33:38
Well, you can always go to my website, love hope. adventure.com. I’m also on Twitter, love hope Advent. And I am on Facebook. And my community is love hip adventure over there.

33:54
Awesome. Okay. Great. Well, I’m really excited for us to continue, you know, connecting and I hope that our listeners will go to your website, because you’ve got some really great articles there and, and also about initiating who we can have you on again, and we can talk specifically about initiating and you can give us more of your insights. I would love that

34:13
would be great. It’s a very difficult thing for anyone to do.

34:18
Yeah, there’s a lot there. There’s a lot to it. So I’d love to dive into that more. Okay, well, Kelly, thank you so much for sharing. I just so appreciate your insights and your wisdom

34:27
for having me on.

34:32
Alright, thank you so much for listening. And I do have a challenge for you as I promised. Now Akili talked about initiating sex and if that’s something you’re uncomfortable with, I would say go ahead and stretch yourself. Now we are going to have another episode on initiating he’s going to come back and talk to us about it. But until that time, I say if you’re not comfortable with it yet, the only way to start getting comfortable is to start stretching yourself outside of your comfort. friendzone and doing what might be unfamiliar territory, but starting from there and going forward. And again, I’m going to have another challenge for you in the future but, and some more insight about it as well. But for right now, what you can do is one thing that you know your husband would want or like or enjoy even just going for it, whether it’s wearing that extra sexy outfit, just for him maybe, or texting him some lingerie pictures or something along those lines or whether it’s actually initiating sex, if that’s uncomfortable for you, whatever it is, do that extra step. This week, that is my challenge for you. Alright, I will talk to you next Tuesday between then and now. I hope you have a fantastic week. Love your husband or your wife or your husband very intentionally this week. And if you get a chance, please leave me a review on iTunes. That would be awesome. God bless you. I love you. I’m praying for you in your marriage. And we will talk soon.

36:00
Thanks for listening. If you’ve been blessed by this, why not share it? Until next time, live with love, wisdom and passion