The organization was founded by Belah Rose who saw the crisis of marriages everywhere and wanted to ring the bell of HOPE! She heard a speaker admonish the listeners: “Don’t decide what you want to do with your life based on what others think you should, the money, or even ‘the sure thing.’ Instead, answer the question: ‘What is the work that needs to be done?'” For Belah, Delight Your Marriage was the resounding answer to that question.

Marital Health Assessment

When you’re not sure why things aren’t changing, and you feel you’re throwing darts in the dark — it’s vital you know where you’re standing right now to improve strategically.

151-Where You Derive Your Value - Delight Your Marriage

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

transcript

0:00
Hey there. belah rose, thank you for joining. I’m not sure if this is your first time, but if it is, I do a podcast I posting every Tuesday it’s been going over two years now, it’s been such a blessing for me, my family, and many people around the world, praise God. And so I felt like I needed to take a couple months off and focus on what I felt like God wanted me to focus on. So what I’m doing for you, is to encourage you and inspire you in your marriage and in your intimacy in your in your marriage. I’m continuing to post podcasts every Tuesday. But it’s an inspiring excerpt from my book, delight your husband, and I am praying that this would be encouraging for you. And especially if you’ve been a longtime listener, and you look forward to the Tuesday broadcasts for your extra umph to push you into a wonderful week of, of oneness with your husband, I am confident that these excerpts will encourage you every week and continue that that tradition that you have have created with the de YM show. Alright, well, let’s go ahead and dive in to today’s reading. Don’t derive your worth from fading things. Whoa, whoa, whoa, you might be thinking. So you wrote a whole book about sex, and you’re telling me it doesn’t matter? Well, kind of. I’m telling you, it’s not the most important thing. I want you to focus on sex and get a passionate and intimate marriage so that the rest of your life can be more purposeful. Sex is a wonderful gift. But it should not be the focus of your life. It should be a vital support in your life. Sex is a false idol, which the enemy has glorified in our society. The enemy has lied to women, that they have to be beautiful, sexually free and spontaneous. Many women live in fear of fear of falling outside of these descriptors. The enemy is smart. If he can get us thinking about our fears, then he can undermine all the work God wants to do through our lives. As women of faith the enemy has tricked us into thinking we must be modest Mary on Sunday morning and sensual Sandra by Sunday night. And unfortunately, they’re well, we should just go eat a jelly doughnut. Just forget about the important work God has destined for your life. If he can, if the enemy can make us focus on these ideals, he has successfully distracted us from our God given assignments, where you derive your value. So consider a woman who is unable to use her arms or legs has a debilitating illness, or recovering from breast cancer, you would agree with me that she shouldn’t be void of purpose, because her physical appearance doesn’t accord with the world standards. So why do you judge yourself that way? You and I need our identity to be wrapped up in being a valued creation of the Most High. We are his daughters. We are not of this world. It is only temporary, things of this world will fade away. First John 217. We need to keep our thoughts on the things above. This eternal focus has eternal rewards. If we commit to God’s perspectives of ourselves, we can remain freed up to focus on what God wants to do through us. So we are going to unpack the fears that may be hindering you, but I want to keep them in context. These fears may come up here and there. But you must let them float on by these fears are not relevant to your life. We must lean into God’s strength and resist the temptation to look at ourselves, the way the enemy lies to us. We must stand strong and realize our worth is tied to the one who formed us who saw us who called us worthy, not for anything we could do to deserve it. Only because of who he is that he chose us to love. Your constant hope can only be placed in Jesus. Eventually the storms come and knock over the house built on sand. But for those who built their house on the rock, the rain fell and the floods came and the winds blew and beat on the house but it did not fall. Matthew two notes Matthew 724 through 25. Right in your workbook what makes you valuable? What are the most important parts of who you You are

5:02
should your value be tied to those things? Where should your value come from? Ask God right now to change your heart in the areas that he identified for you. Ask him to help you change your values and not let them lie in the temporary and the fading aspects of this world. But to build your foundation upon the rock. Why you don’t have to be scared? Maybe it’s strange to admit, but fear is a huge barrier to your sexual fulfillment. As women who grew up oblivious, abused, or another less than ideal background, we are often scared of many aspects of sex. Women who have slowly witnessed their marriage beds becoming stale, often have insecurity at the root. Fear that you’re not good enough in bed, fear of not receiving your husband’s approval, fear of showing your imperfect body fear of not knowing how to please your husband. I’ve wrestled with all of the above fears and more. These fears are so powerful that women sink into depression, addiction and often and other coping patterns to avoid dealing with them. At the very least women neglect their intimate relationships with their husbands. As a result, this has got to stop. The first step towards change is acknowledging the concern, admitting that these fears nag you and drive a wedge between you and a fulfilling marriage. So I’m going to skip a little bit, but fear of inadequate physical beauty. I’m just going to kind of skip through and talk a little bit about this but

6:53
the enemy also lies to us saying that you cannot sexually satisfy if you are not physically perfect. It’s just not true. What does that say about your physical beauty? The Bible says nothing of Eve’s physical appearance, except that she was naked and unashamed. There is no mention of her toned arms, amazingly proportional curves or thimble sized waist. She may have had a thick midsection, short legs and flabby arms. But Adam found her desirable and wonderful. He took delight in her beauty. God designed her looks for Adams pleasure. His first words, when she came on the scene was a poetic song in Genesis 223. It was not an atom’s consciousness to compare her with some standard of beauty. So yeah, skipping a little bit, God has made you, he has made you beautiful and wonderful. And your job is to discipline yourself to believe this about yourself and about your body. I’m just gonna say it again. Your job is to discipline yourself to believe this about yourself and your body. Alright, well, that is the reading for today. Thank you for joining me. I hope that you are encouraged to discipline yourself, to believe in your beauty and flaunt it for your husband. All right, God bless you. I love you. Thank you for joining me and make sure you are grateful today to God for what he’s put in your life and and consider kind of what we started off talking about in not putting your hope on the things that are temporary, but recognizing the import of your marriage and what that means for eternity that you that you that you get things in perspective. What does that look like? What does that mean? I could talk a lot more about it. But that’s all for now. God bless you. Thanks for joining. I’ll talk to you on Tuesday.

151-Where You Derive Your Value

Receive Weekly Insights